It Happened … again

We moved to small-town Indiana in 1999 after living on both coasts for most of our lives (well, my family lived in Wisconsin until I was 7, but that doesn’t really count since I remember very little of those years.)

Our first year here I had a few people invite me to join their church. I clearly remember the first time. I was SPEECHLESS. I couldn’t imagine someone being that forward and totally tripped over my tongue before telling them I wasn’t interested.

After discussing it with Hubby (who pointed out that I should be flattered that they consider me a ‘good person’ that they’d like to be part of their church) I think I did a little better the second time. But I sure found it awkward and pushy.

A number of years later I was very involved with the homeschool group and open about being an Atheist. I didn’t throw a fit if someone wanted to say a group prayer before an activity and they weren’t telling me I couldn’t be part of the group because on my lack of Sunday morning activities…

until one of their churches had a “carry-in” (otherwise known as a potluck) dinner with the theme of “Invite and Atheist to Dinner.”

“So Meg. Would you and your family like to be our guests??”

Ah, what??… Ummm, no thank you.

And that brings me up to the last couple of year and the secular chorus I sing with.  It’s not quite as secular as I’d like (living in small-town Indiana) with each rehearsal starting with health concerns and “please pray for…” requests.  But I try to look at those few minutes as their attempts to care for each other (some of these people have been in the group for over 30 years) within the framework of what they know.

Up until nearly this past year, one member (my friend that encouraged me to join) and I have joked that she’s the token Jew and I’m the token Atheist and I have kept a fairly low profile about my lack of belief.  I haven’t lied or hide it, just not screamed it and rubbed it in their faces. (This year there’s been a large group of new members and I’m pretty sure about half of them aren’t Christian – though I haven’t asked.)

Interacting with these ladies (it’s a women’s chorus) has made me realize that around here (as much as my East Coast sensibilities think that asking about church and religion is invasive) it’s just basic small talk. And on more than one occasion as we’ve driven to this or that the topic has come up.

I’ve shocked more than one of the ladies.

One lady after giving me this long story about her church (that I don’t remember asking for) that lead into how her extended family (cousins, I think) were terrible people that drank etc, etc, etc, and didn’t believe in god or go to church.  At which point she turns to me and asks what church I attend… it was almost funny watching her try to understand how someone that was an Atheist could be me.

And I’ve had that reaction from others.  One lady actually came out with:

“How could someone as intelligent as you, not believe in God??”

which was certainly a twist for me.  (Another lady that overhead that one actually came up to me later and admitted to being Agnostic, but she doesn’t share that with most of the chorus.)

And as I’ve started to become Facebook friends with some of the other chorus members I’ve gotten comments from a few ladies about how my posts are……interesting.

But the email I recently received made me realize that to all these people I am an exotic animal.  Something for them to trot out on display.

“Hey everyone, look!  I know an Atheist!”

Okay, it’s not quite like that.

But the recent email is for a dinner (at a good restaurant) with this group whose speaker will be Jon Page of Bargersville, IN, on “From Atheist to Christian”.

Well now.

I like the person that invited me and I appreciate that she wants to share …

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